Congrats and Envy

I just got news that a very dear friend of mine is expecting her first child in July! This is wonderful news and I am so happy for her. Although she lives in the Pacific Northwest, we trade emails every week (all credit to her — I am a lousy correspondent when left to my own devices). She will be an amazing mother and her husband will be a very cool dad. Although I would be 100x happier if we were pregnant together, my continued disappointment does not cancel out my joy for her.

At least I can put my premature desire to buy adorable baby things to good use now!

Adorable

Focus Features has a new documentary called Babies coming out next year. The film will follow four babies (one from Namibia, one from Japan, one from Mongolia, and one from the US) from birth through their first birthdays. It doesn't seem to be overly analytical —more of an extended awww opportunity than a hard-hitting investigation.

The trailer is beautiful.

I especially enjoy the Mongolian baby's squishy cheeks.

Also, the American baby's name is Hattie, which is another name I love but FB doesn't (even though he has Harriets in his family tree and I most certainly do not).

Naming Styles

Despite recent disappointments, I continue to indulge my love of names. We may not have a baby for years, but that just means I'll have years of fun thinking up names for him/her.

FB and I are generally agreed on naming styles, though I do tend to go for the obscure, while he is not as bothered by popularity. Neither of us likes the kree8tyv names like Mydyysyn or Bryler. I tend to like names from the 17th and early 19th centuries (as well as my Italian family names) while FB likes short names that are easy for English-speakers to spell and pronounce. These are not irreconcilable situations, but they mean that we will both have to compromise.

For example, I will probably never convince FB that Una is an adorable name, though I love it to pieces. Similarly, he will have a difficult time convincing me that Lily Evans is a perfectly acceptable name because Evans is a family name on his mother's side and no one will ever get the Harry Potter reference (yes they will!).

Even when we like the same names, we like different versions of them. He likes Claire, I prefer Clara. He'd like an Ellie, I'd choose Nell. He would call a Charles Chuck, I'd certainly go for Charlie. And on and on.

At least we don't need to decide right away.

Bummer

Took a pregnancy test this morning — no go.

I'm headed to my parents' for Christmas in a few days, so I wanted to test even though it is a bit too early in my cycle to be sure the test was valid. With our holiday travels, I won't have access to medical care for the next month, so even if I did test positive later this week, I wouldn't be able to see a doctor until well into January.

Grumble.

Safety Hysteria

I generally object to the idea that all women under the age of 50 should consider themselves "pre-pregnant" at all times. However, since I am actively trying to get pregnant, I suppose that the term applies to me.

I've been taking a prescription prenatal multivitamin for a few months now, but other than that, I haven't changed my habits much. I don't drink, smoke, or drink coffee, so I haven't cut those things out. I do drink a can or two of diet cola on most days, but most recommendations I've seen suggest that pregnant women keep their caffeine consumption under 200 mg per day, and I don't think that I'm in any danger of surpassing that mark. I have not varied my (very moderate) exercise regime, and have generally carried on as usual.

Reading up on "experts'" recommendations for pregnant women is a frustrating experience. As far as I can tell, I should have wrapped myself in cotton and started an all-organic kale diet the moment I went off the pill. I'm pretty sure that I'm not going to ruin my hypothetical child's life by eating California rolls, drinking tap water, or using glue to make Christmas ornaments. Here's my favorite bit of advice for pregnant women, courtesy of The Seattle Times: stay away from electricity.

Note that the authors are not recommending that babies steer clear of electrical outlets — they are arguing that handling appliances is "a definite 'don't'" for pregnant adults.

No word yet on whether it's safe to sit on my couch, in light of the risk of shocks from static electricity.

Acne

I've always thought that I had relatively clear skin. Sure, I had fairly regular pimples when I was in middle school, but they were generally isolated — a single zit, not a rash of them all at once. Since leaving high school, I have probably averaged 5-6 facial zits per year. I generally wash my face with soap and water.

Yet, it occurs to me now that I may have had the pill to thank for my reliably clear skin. Ever since I quit the pill, I have been in a near-constant state of breakout. Every few days, I feel a hot, painful lump bubbling up on my upper lip or chin. My forehead is a solid mass of tiny bumps. I'm even getting some pimples on the back of my neck and behind my ears, which is both painful and annoying.

Today, I found myself in the skin care aisle of CVS, standing between two thirteen-year-olds and trying to weigh the relative merits of Clearsil vs. Clean and Clear. I ended up with a basketful of Aveeno products because they had more grown-up packaging.

Do other people have this problem? And am I in for worse if I do manage to get pregnant at some point?

Bad Blogger

Most blogs run for a week or two before they are abandoned for good. By that standard, I did a good job by running for a couple of months before going AWOL. Let's just call it vacation.

Nothing has changed since my last post, except that my anxiety level is starting to go up a little bit. I turned 26 in October, making me officially older than average for a first-time mother in America (though still substantially younger than most first time moms in my liberal New England city).

FB and I said that we would try until Christmas before taking some deliberate steps. There's still a small chance that I might turn up pregnant in the next three weeks, but it's a long shot. FB has an extended business trip and I'll be going home to help my parents prepare for the holiday, so there won't be many opportunities for us to try between now and January.

I'm not panicking yet. But I'm getting a little anxious.